Top Funny Quote

Top Funny Quotes

 

1. Common sense is like a Deodorant. The people who need it most never use it.

2. People of my age are busy with Relation, Break up and Patch ups. But I’m still figuring out a way to wake up before 10 AM.

3. “Salary is credited”, the three more powerful words after “I love you”

4. Facebook is like Sunglasses. It allowing you to stare at people without getting caught.

5. If a woman could able to read mind, then every second man will get slapped

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6. If you really want to slap someone, do it and say “Oh sorry, I thought that was a Mosquito”.

7.  Do you want to save your money every year? Just break up on 13 the of February and get back together on 15th of February.

8. Do you know the different between us and Camels? Camels can work without drinking for 7 days and we can drink without working for 7 days.

9. One day girlfriend asks her boyfriend, darling, on our engagement day will you give me a RING? Boyfriend replied, yes sure.. give me your telephone number and I’ll RING you.

10. Mark Zuckerberg is only child in the world whose mom tells him to, “Pay attention to Facebook”

11. My phone’s “low battery” warning is the only warning I take seriously.

12. Early to bed and early to rise simply proves that, the person has no internet connection

13. Good girls are not good looking. Good looking girls are not good girls. Good girls and good looking girls are not single. Good girls, good looking girls, and singles are having strong Brothers.

14. Do you know why best friends standing throughout their friend’s wedding ceremony? Only best friends standing with you when your bad times.

15. Making your girlfriend happy is as easy as playing piano with boxing gloves on.

16. A boy is praying in the classroom and Teacher asked that boy, why you are praying? Boy replied, Mom advised me that “before sleeping you must pray”

17. Best advertisement in front of one of the photo studio shop. “We can shoot your wife and also frame your mother-in-law”

18. The 1999 year kids expect their bed near the window to see the moon and stars. But 2015 kids expect their bed near the mobile charging slot.

19. The only person who looks good in a group photo is always the one who uploads it.

20. Women fall in love by what they hear and men fall in love by what they see. That is why most of the women put makeup and most of the men lie.

21. The Broccoli says I look like a small tree.. the Mushroom says I look like a umbrella.. the Walnut says I look like a brain.. and the Banana says ‘Can we please change the subject?’

22. A thief broke into my house last night. He then started searching for money so I woke up and searched for him.

23. When a woman says “What?”, it’s not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.

24. If you really want your friend to remember you, lend some money from them.

25. If women rule the world, there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.

26. One of the funniest situation in student life is when we have no idea what to write in the exam paper and the supervisor comes and says, “Please cover your answer sheet”

27. Girls hate it when boys ask their age, but they would kill you if you forget their birthday.

28. This generation boys and girls, fall in love because of misunderstanding and break up when they start understanding each other. It’s funny but true.

29. Behind every successful hangover, there is a promise of never drinking again.

30. Here is the secret formula for married couples. “Love One Another”, and if it doesn’t work, bring the last word to the middle.